Category: Men

The Missing Bun (ask for password)

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The only time, women are happy to feel sick 24/7 is when they are pregnant!

Almost a year ago I had a very early miscarriage. I didn’t even know I was pregnant…

Forward to the year 2021:

A month ago I started to feel queasy all the time and was drinking so much water, I could have drunk it straight from the hose.

My due date for my period came and passed and I was so happy. All the symptoms where there…..

….until the morning I started to heavily bleed…..

And just like that it was over.

It wasn’t the end of the world as I know that is nature sorting things out, that what could have been a baby wasn’t healthy enough to live just yet.

But I was still sad. Sad because I knew what could have been and said because it took us so long to get to this point! Future husband was sad as well, of course he was.

Everyone who has been trying for some time knows where I am coming from.

Every month you hope it happened but no, shark week is on again. SIGH.

And the fact, that according to my age I only have a 5% chance to get pregnant every month, doesn’t help either.

I already consulted the doctors. The next step is the fertility clinic for check ups.

So fingers crossed, legs open and off to another few rounds of lots of fun.

Until the next time

Shocked, Disgusted & Thoughtful

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Recently I was talking with a co-worker. We where talking about our families and our (my) current living arrangements.

When I told her, that I left the house to my ex she ice cold said:

“I would have not done that. You have given up a career for the children. He should sell the house and give you half of the money as you earned it, you are entitled to it!”

Excuse me?!

I very consciously decided to bring life into this world. I wanted these children. And I was lucky enough that my ex earned enough so that I could stay at home and get to spend precious time with them and raise them.

I, decided to stay at home and not work!

My ex has been paying the mortgage and will continue to do so. So why, when I don’t contribute to it, am I entitled to the house and the money?

Only because I gave birth to his children? That is just ridiculous!

Why are people still so materialistic? Money does not make you happy!

This co-worker will definitely not become a friend of mine, I can tell you that!

Franky

She Visited Me- In my Dreams

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A couple of days ago I woke up.

I felt all cozy and happy and at peace.

I dreamt of my grandma. She visited me in my dreams. I can’t remember what the dream was about.

When I awoke, I wanted to fall back asleep. So bad. But it did not happen.

My grandma passed away a couple of years ago, but I am a great believer when it comes to the dead visiting you (in different ways).

Usually it would be on halloween, or in form of a robin. This time it was in my dream.

I like to believe that we had a nice conversation about everything that has been going on in my life recently.

I am sure every now and again she would have started a sentence with

“Oh well child…”, just like she used to do when she wanted to open my eyes about certain things.

When she was still alive, I would call her whenever I felt bad. Or even when I needed advise for random things. Or just to talk. I would always call her…

Nowadays when I feel sad the first thing that comes to my mind is, to call her. Still after so many years. And then realisation hits. I can’t call her. She is not here anymore. She can’t give me advise and reassure me that everything will work out eventually.

But I am very certain, that in my dream she did just that!

She told me I will find my way and that everything will be just like I imagine it will be. And I am sure, she hugged me and held me tight only the way she could.

I am sure she was happy to hear, that I found someone who takes care of me and who protects me so she doesn’t have to worry.

When I woke up I felt loved and save. She came when I needed her the most.

Thank you, Grandma.

I love you.

Always!

Until the next time.

Franky